I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize