I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
