smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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