i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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