can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
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