arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
