Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
