Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize
