Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
