I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize