worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
this will be a night to untag.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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