ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
