Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
