no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Randomize
