i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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