you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
