Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Randomize
