would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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