i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Randomize
