I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize
