Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
