No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
This is the high leading the old right now
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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