I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Randomize
