'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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