Heybabeimwearingurpanties
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
