I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
vagina is talking i cant
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Randomize
