Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize