You surviving the open bar?
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We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
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