dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Randomize
