I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
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