question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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