she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I need a beard to bite.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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