I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
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