Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
