Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize