i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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