I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
