After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
