is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
there is glitter all over my balls
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
