just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
