I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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