is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Randomize
