sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
