i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize
