im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
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