He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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