Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
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