you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Randomize
