Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
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