my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
