Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
