I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Randomize
