It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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